I am feeling a little frustrated with my husband today...just for something different. You see, while I accept the division of labour that we have and our "roles" in this phase of our lives, I am kind of pissed off with the way he thinks that he can say "Oh I'm stuck at work" and get off scott-free. I don't think he has even seen his kids awake since Tuesday night?!?! Don't get me wrong, I know there are times where he has to work late and I tolerate his absences with a smile on my face...most days. Frankly however, today I am sick of being a married single parent!!
Darling husband worked late last night and because it was "Thirsty Thursday" (the night he has a few mates around for drinks in the man cave) I told him, explicitly, to call his mates and cancel because he wasn't going to be home. I was so clear that I said "Mat, make sure you call them and let them know it's not on. I have already taken my bra off for the day so I don't really want to be greeting company with my boobs resting on my hip bones!" Of course he said he would call them and of course, he did not. So I had three male visitors yesterday evening come to my door while I wore my daggy PJ's, had a rosehip oil treatment lighting up my face like a beacon and, yep, you guessed it, no bra on. Grrrrrr.
Anyway, about 8:30pm hubby said he was on his way home. No worries, I thought, I'm pretty shattered and could easily go to bed but I will wait till he is home so I can see him. An hour passed and still no hubby. I called him and he says he has just stopped by a mates house for a drink!!!!!!!!!! This would not normally be a problem except for the fact that he said he was on his way home, I was waiting for him and for some unknown reason, Elliott had been up screaming for about 45 minutes and nothing I was doing was pleasing him! I just wanted a break! Needless to say, I eventually got Elliott back to sleep and went to bed myself with no husband in sight.
As I lay awake this morning listening to hubby's ute driving out of the yard, I came up with a brilliant plan. Tomorrow, Mat is home. I am going to set my alarm for 5am and snooze it about 6 times. Then I am going to get up, get ready for the day, kiss him goodbye and say "I'm off to work". Then, I am going to spend the whole day out. I will tell him of course that I will be home about 11am, and then not turn up. Let's see how much he likes being on the other end of it. I will also leave a list of all the things that I was going to do tomorrow (washing, floors etc) and he can try and fit that in amongst playing with the kids and running some errands. I think I might catch a movie, go to the library and also a friend of mine just messaged me about a feng shui relationships course on tomorrow afternoon so I will be going to that too. I will also go to Indigiscapes and enjoy some solitude on a quiet little bush walk. Yep, and I might even pop over to Mum's for a nap...see how I go.
I know this sounds utterly childish, but honest to God I have no idea how else to tackle this right now. I have tried explaining to him how I feel, I have tried negotiating with him, I have tried ignoring the problem entirely which just results in him doing whatever he pleases and to hell with the rest of us (this is a phase I call "The Mat Show"). I am sure his theory is that it is easier to ask for forgiveness rather than permission. Not that he needs to ask permission, he just needs to realise that we are a family and his choices don't only affect him. As I said, he hasn't seen his kids awake for days now!
Anyway, I shall let you know how this all pans out next week. Wish me luck! Or better yet, offer up some strategies for dealing with a situation like this...? Please!!! Surely I am not the only one with a frustrating husband??!!
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