Have a break, have a KitKat

When I was at school, I used to be pretty good at maths. I actually thoroughly enjoyed the black and white element of knowing that an answer will either be right or wrong and there were no two ways about it. Now however, I seem to have forgotten the fundamental principles of mathematics...like the fact that there are only 24hrs in a day and therefore, it is completely impossible to do the equivalent of 48hrs work in that time. It just can't be done, 48 does not go into 24 no matter how hard I try.

In saying that, I have had a bit of a lightbulb moment and realised I am simply trying to fit too much into my days, hours and even minutes! I am doing a half-arsed job at everything because I am spreading myself too thin by wearing too many hats each day; Mum, wife, housekeeper, chef, taxi service, business administrator, budding writer, cake maker, budding entrepreneur and blogger. I just can't fit it all in! And of course, the ones who are suffering the most from my overflowing plate are the kids. Poor Sophie is going through a phase where she has a complete meltdown any time we part ways. She pleads with me to stay with her and cries so sorrowfully when I do leave. It breaks my heart! Then there is young Elliott who has taken "playing up" to a whole new level. He is being soooo unbelievably naughty in an effort to get my attention because I guess he figures that the amount of positive attention he gets all day just doesn't cut it. 

So with all of that in mind, I have come to the decision that I have to temporarily take a few things off my plate and my blog is one of those things :(  Don't get me wrong, I love blogging about how amazing and terrible motherhood can be but unfortunately, right now, I am doing an amazingly terrible job of being a Mum!!! So for the next week or two, I am dropping off the face of the Earth and other than Kindy, swimming lessons and dancing, the kids and I will be spending all of our time together engaging in quality experiences. I am committed to the idea of giving them my full and undivided attention and reinforce to them that they are the most important things in this World to me. 

I look forward to chatting to you again in a week or two and hopefully I will be writing about how happy my kids are :)

Kate xox

Good Morning Everyone!!!!

Hello lovely souls...Happy Monday :) I have woken up in the most wonderful mood and I have not stopped smiling, laughing and showering the kids with kisses and love since the day started. It is delightful! I am surprised that I feel this good though after the epic cake failure that will go down in history as my brothers 30th birthday... 

I made what could be considered the most average cake ever. It was a simple chocolate cake that sunk in the middle, covered with a milk chocolate ganache and topped with yummy raspberries. It tasted great but it looked like a four year old had made it (and if my four year old wasn't such a chatterbox blabbermouth, I probably would have blamed it on her!) Now this doesn't sound like a very big deal but I have set a precedent of making awesome cakes no matter what the occasion, so an average cake for a 30th birthday is pretty poor form. To top it off, my Dad accidentally knocked the cake box off its perch and it landed topside down on the floor. Splat! It was actually hilarious and I know that if it had of been one of my usual creations, I would have burst into tears for sure. So luckily it was an average cake because it was destined for terrible things from the start. 

Anyway, the point of sharing this story with you is that I have learned a valuable lesson that I can apply to every element of my life...and I hope you can too!! There is no such thing as "perfect" and the world does not fall off its axis if things do not go perfectly to plan. We spend so much time planning and organising to make things perfect, but in reality there is no need. Just as it is with beauty, perfection is in the eye of the beholder. This morning, there are soggy Weetbix on the bench, Elliott is working on one revoltingly smelly surprise for me in his nappy, there is washing piled up in my room just begging to be folded, toys everywhere, an un-swept floor and paperwork coming out my whazoo...but in my eyes, today is just perfect. 

Read this quote below, then read it and read it again until it clicks. Lets not waste anymore of our time trying to make things perfect...

   

Make-up day

I totally jinxed myself yesterday by writing how uneventful chaos headquarters had been. Silly me!

Soph wouldn't have a nap, nor would she dare to dabble with the idea of having a quiet rest. Come 5pm and the results were a tired and cranky four year old and an even more worn out and cranky Mum! I had a fight with Mat when he got home because seconds after I told him how exhausted I was and how pleased I was that he was home early enough to give me hand, he said he was going out again. Agggghhhhh! Men, who would have them?!?!?! So, after he left, I prepared dinner in a very pissed off mood and he came home in time to join the kids and I to eat it. Naturally, the kids fussed and carried on the whole time with Soph refusing to eat her rice and vegies and Elliott just throwing his food and drink EVERYWHERE! Then it happened...

I snapped. I lost my shit. I yelled at the kids how about how fed up I was with bending over backwards for them day in and day out and that they are so ungrateful for everything I do (in hindsight, of course they are ungrateful...they are kids!) I carried on like a total pork chop and as you can imagine, Soph was pretty devastated...Elliott on the other hand didn't seem to care at all. I stormed out of the dining room and Mat tried to comfort Sophie. While I was sitting in the other room, steaming, Mat asked Sophie why she was feeling so sad. What she said next absolutely broke my heart. Through tears and sobbing, she whimpered to Mat "Mummy doesn't want me anymore". Oh my God. I burst into tears and started the process of beating myself up for being the most horrible mother on Earth. I have never told Sophie that I don't want her and it breaks my heart that losing my temper resulted in her feeling that way. Mother of the Year moment, once again. 

Needless to say, today shall be spent making sure the kids know that there is nothing in the World more important to me than them. The focus will be on speaking calmly, smiling profusely, laughing, hugging, kissing and playing with them all day. Whatever I am doing, I shall stop to give them the attention they require...for example, while I have been typing this post, I have stopped several times to read books to Elliott, jump on the exercise trampoline with Sophie and set up a construction activity with blocks and tools for them both to enjoy. 

It is extremely exhausting that there is never a moment that you can let your guard down and take a day off from being a good Mum. But on the flip side, it is extremely awesome that I get to wake up every day to the smile and love from two beautiful children and I am blessed with the opportunity to be a good Mum again. Bring on the make-up day :) 

A little bit about nothing

Hi everyone! I really don't have anything too exciting to report today so it is likely to be a post with a whole lot of rambling about nothing... 

We've enjoyed a lovely morning playing at the park with our gorgeous Mums Group pals and have just returned from an impromptu doctors appointment for Sophie. She woke up yesterday with a puffy top lip and I did all the usual stuff like antihistamine and ice and hoped that it would resolve itself. When she woke up this morning though, it hadn't improved so I took her off to the doctors just to be sure. Not surprisingly, the doctor looked at me like I was "one of those" Mums that takes their child to see the GP for no real reason at all. He suggested I continue with the antihistamine and if things were not better in a week, come back. I think I am getting used to that look from Doctors but I would rather be over the top and have my child checked out than do nothing at all and have whatever the ailment turn into something serious.

As for our time at the park, when I arrived I was the first one there from our group. There were a couple of other Mums playing with their one child and having a lovely time. I kind of felt compelled to play with my kids seeing these beautiful interactions going on, but then I got my wits about me: today is Thursday, the one morning a week that I don't have to entertain the kids because they spend the time running amok with their friends! I put our bags down at a table and cheered and praised the kids from the sidelines instead. All was right with the world :)

Other than that, absolutely nothing worth writing about has happened in the last 24 hours. It's kind of nice to go at a slower pace when you consider the usual chaos that I write about. In fact, I think I will have a cup of tea and catch the end of Dr Phil before getting on with the afternoon chores. Bye :)    

  

Tattle-Tale

Every time I pick Sophie up from Kindy, her teachers are eager to share with me the funny stories about her day that have amused them so thoroughly. It would appear that yesterday, I was the subject of their hilarity...

First, let me take you back a few steps. Over the weekend, I enjoyed a lazy Sunday morning in bed reading a book while hubby "took care" of the kids. It took a lot of elbowing and shoving from me to remind him he had to get up and tend to them mind you, but the bottom line is he did eventually get his act together enough to allow me the opportunity for a lie-in. From the comfort of my warm bed I could hear the chaos of the morning unfolding and with a novice driver at the wheel (aka: Daddy) it was  little more out of control than usual. Never the less, I stayed in bed and read my book, adamant that I would not get up and save the day...surely they could survive for one morning without me!!!??? Then, I got up...

The house looked like a bomb had gone off in a toy shop. The day before, Mat had acquired (lawfully) 12 radio control cars and he and the kids had decided every single one of them needed to be driven around the house through a maze of boxes and polystyrene packaging. Lots of fun. I retreated to the shower while they continued with their play. After a short while, Elliott came down to have a chat...I got a whiff of toilet block and called out to Mat. "I think Elliott has been playing in the bathroom cupboard because he smells of toilet blocks. Can you sort that out please?" Mat dutifully took Elliott to clean him up and suss out what trouble he had been into. He came back to report "Well, the good news is, Elliott wasn't playing with the toilet blocks in the cupboard". Oh no I thought to myself. "Yep, he's been playing with the one in the toilet. There are finger marks all through it and he has it all over his face, his hands and his head". Yuk! I sighed at the complete lack of supervision that occurs when Daddy's on duty. Will this ever change? I pondered. 

When I got out of the shower, I could hear Mat in the living area playing with toy cars but the tell-tale sounds of Elliott into mischief were coming from the main bathroom again. I dried off and stormed in there only to find Elliott squeezing the new tube of toothpaste into the sink and smearing it everywhere. By now, I was not sighing at Mat's lack of supervision, I was pissed off. I roused on Elliott then went out to the living area to give Mat a serve. When I got there however I saw what looked like mooshy Weet-Bix on the couch. I suspected Mat had let Elliott down from the bench without cleaning him up after breakfast and crankily asked "What is that!?!?" Mat pleaded ignorance but thankfully Sophie was there to save the day..."That's Toby's vomit" she said. WHAT!!!!!!! Now I was frustrated with hubby for not only his poor supervision of the kids but his complete ignorance as to the goings on in the household...how did he not notice the dog had vomited on the couch?!? I had my little spat, told Mat how frustrated I was with him then went back to our room to get dressed. 

OK, so with that information tucked under our belts, the story Sophie shared with her Kindy teachers will make more sense...

"Did you know that Elliott got the Spider Man toothpaste and squeeeeezed and squeeeezed the whole toothpaste into the sink. And, he wiped it everywhere, all over him and all over the mirror. Then Mummy came out of the shower rudie-nudie and roused on Elliott and Daddy".

Tattle-Tale.            

Time is flying

Yesterday was a pretty big day here at Chaos Headquarters...it was Sophie's Prep Orientation Day! The plan was that everyone would meet in the Hall, the kids would go off to the Prep classrooms for a morning of play while the parents stayed in the hall for an information session regarding the school and enrolment process. Great idea in theory. When it came to practical application, Sophie had other plans...

We arrived and she seemed happy enough. She gripped onto my hand and stayed right by my side, which is understandable considering how overwhelming walking into a crowded hall must be for a four year old. We signed in and lined up in one of the rows of children ready to head off to the classrooms. I was chatting to parents and introducing Sophie to other children but she was glued to me. She refused to sit down with the other kids in line and kept pleading that she didn't want me to leave her. No amount of reassuring her made any difference and when it came time for us to part ways, she was literally climbing up me, screaming and crying. I felt awful. It is so hard seeing your usually confident, self assured and happy child absolutely terrified and in tears. I tried handing her over to the teacher but she wouldn't have a bar of it. I ended up going up to the classroom with her, during which time she would burst into tears if I was more than 1 metre away from her. It was heartbreaking! I was nearly in tears thinking about how on Earth she was going to cope when it comes time to actually go to school! She eventually settled down a little bit and I was able to duck off to the information session. We were apart for about 45 minutes and by the time we met back up in the hall, we were both anxious to see each other. I was relieved to see that Soph had a smile on her face and proudly showed me a picture she had drawn of herself in Prep. Phew!

I honestly have no idea how we got to this school stage so fast! It seems like only a month ago I was holding my precious little newborn daughter in my arms and promising her the world. Now here we are, nearly five years later, and I don't feel I have given her what I wanted to in that time. Of course I know I have given her some pretty great  things like a sense of belonging, a solid family foundation from which she knows she is loved immeasurably and a happy childhood full of wonderful memories (I am just hoping she doesn't remember all my shortcomings...hopefully she never reads this blog!!) But with all the great things aside, it is only human nature to look at the not so great things I have done and even worse, the things I haven't done and focus on them. 

I can't change anything about the last five years but I can make a change starting today. I have six more months of having my baby home before she goes off to school and I am going to step up my game (no idea how yet, that will have to be a later post when I have had more time to think about it). My advice to anyone out there would be to make the most of every single day you have with your children because the time just flies by.    

Loud and clear

Good morning everyone! It is another beautiful Monday, the beginning of another busy week and the chance for another fresh start. My utter pleasure at the fresh start element of today makes me feel like I am beating my post natal depression and possibly getting back to my old self...YAY! Part of this battle has involved reading many self-help books (some great, some utter rubbish) and so today I wanted to share part of that journey with you...

I called my Mum a few weeks back to praise her and thank her. I was doing an exercise from one book that involved writing down the messages (spoken or otherwise) that you received from your parents and other influential people in your life about what you should do with your life when you grow up. You all know the messages like study hard and get a good job or make lots of money and buy a house to secure your future. The whole idea of the exercise is to identify the difference between what you think you should be doing with your life based on those messages, and what your heart really desires out of life. My two biggest influencers were undoubtedly my Mum and Dad but their messages were vastly different:

Dad's message was loud and clear: life is all about money. Growing up involved getting your education, getting a good secure job, making a very decent income and living happily ever after.

Mum's message was more subtle and it wasn't until I did this exercise that I realised it even existed. From Mum's perspective, growing up was all about finding what makes you happy. It sounds so cliché, but Mum really did want my brothers and I to grow up and be happy :)

Neither message was right or wrong and both have contributed to the person I am today. I've taken on board what I need from Dad's message that money is important, but for me, it is not the be-all-end-all measure of success like he sees it as. As for Mum's message, I have taken that on board fully. Happiness is where it's at! Happiness just seems to make everything easier and life seems a whole lot more rosy...including getting a good job and making money just like Dad said.It's win win I guess.   

Has this little story got you thinking? Sometime this week (even today if you can) have a think about the messages you received growing up telling you what you are "supposed" to be doing with your life. You can extend this activity to consider the messages you are currently receiving from friends, family and even your hubby or wife. Everyone else thinks they are experts on our lives and while it is important to listen respectfully, only you can determine what you are genuinely "supposed" to be doing. Only you know what is right for you, what makes your heart sing, what makes you want to jump out of bed every day and grab life with both hands. Have a think about it and you may be surprised with what you find. 

Happy Monday xox 

Coming down off a high

Now how on Earth do I follow up yesterday's hilarious blog post with anything worthwhile? What I should have done was save that gold until today and end the week on a really high note. Honest to God, I spent the whole day breaking out in random fits of laughter every time I thought about the fanny brush (in fact, right now as I type this, I have burst out laughing again resulting in a spray of spit showering my computer screen. Gross). I had a girlfriend text me to say that she was doing her grocery shopping last night and that she would keep her eyes peeled to purchase her very own fanny brush. I had a chat on the phone to another girlfriend who mentioned that she planned to do the stomp-a-dee all day after doing the school drop off. I also did the stomp-a-dee while I watched Dr Phil during the kids nap time and enjoyed the heck out of it! The episode was about a hugely obese man who was virtually immobile and I must say, I was nearly compelled to put down the king size chunky Kit Kat I was eating...then I realised we measure weight in kilograms not pounds so I would never be in a position where I weighed over 700lb (yep, that's how warped my thinking gets when I have to justify eating junk food). 

Anyway, back on track with trying to figure out what to write about today......? All that is coming to mind is how much fun I have had this week with my kids. There really is nothing like looking at the world through the eyes of a child to bring out the laughter in you. Right now I am watching Elliott do the air guitar and "dance" to some music. Hilarious to see! I am reminiscing on mine and Sophie's breakfast conversation..."Mum, where did Daddy find you to marry you? Mum, before you had me and Elliott, where did Daddy get his a-sectomy? Mum, how did they do the a-sectomy. Mum, what was the doctors name? Do you know what Mum, Bridgy (her imaginary husband) doesn't want to get an a-sectomy because he just wants me to have more babies". You know, the usual breakfast conversation you have with a four year old. 

Yep, it really has been a great week filled with fun and laughter, something that I haven't enjoyed in such high quantities in a really long time. I hope the stories I have shared have brightened your week too!! Chat to you all on Monday for our Motivational Monday piece xox

PS - very exciting news...Elliott just did his first wee on the toilet!!!!!!!!!!! Amazing what you find "exciting" once you become a Mum :) 

I Googled "so happy" to find an appropriate picture for today...this is what I found. Hilarious! Keep the laughter going guys and enjoy your weekend 

The Fanny Brush

We all know that privacy is a very elusive thing in the game of motherhood and no trip to the bathroom is made without an audience. Yesterday was no exception and Sophie was her usual chatty self as I dared to take a minute to empty my bladder. What was different though, was how vocal she was about her new interest in "private parts"...

Sophie- "Mum, do you absolutely have hair on your fanny?" (asked very matter of factly with a cheeky smirk on her face).

Me- "Yep" (thinking to myself that I must to make a waxing appointment ASAP).

Sophie- "Why?"

Me- "Well it happens when you are a teenager. You start to get hair on your vagina and it stays there when you are a grown up".

Sophie- "Ahhh" (as if that answer totally made sense). "Well I have hair on my fanny now. See?" (she boasts as she swiftly pulls down her pants).

Me- "Not really Honey, you don't get hair on your fanny until you are a teenager".

Sophie- "No Mum. See, I have blonde hair on there now!"

Me-"Well there might be a little bit of blonde hair there now, just like on the rest of our bodies, but when you are much older, there will be lots more on there".

Sophie- "Ohhhhhhhhhhhha, I wish I had hair on my fanny right now!" 

Me-"Why?" (a giggle starting to bubble in my voice).

Sophie- "Because having hair on your vagina would be fun".

Me - "What?" (insert laughter here!) "Why would hair on your vagina be fun?"

Sophie- "Because you can have hair on there and sit on your vagina and stuff like that, that would be fun". 

Me- "Really? That is why you think it would be fun?"

Sophie- "Yes. You actually just sit on it".

Me- "Fair enough. So you don't put hair clips in it or anything like that. Not like the hair on your head?"

She looked at me like I was an idiot. 

Sophie- "No. You just brush it with a fanny brush"

The laughter was uncontrollable now. 

Me- "A fanny brush? What?" laughing so hard. "What on Earth does a fanny brush look like?"

Sophie- "It looks like a slinky, with zigzags. You buy it from the supermarket you know." (All said so matter of factly).  

I am now crying with laughter. 

Sophie is really into singing and rhyming right now so she belted out a tune in her operatic singing voice...

Sophie- "If you can see some dry stuff, you can see a fanny brush". 

The laughter continues. The singing continues... 

Sophie- "Doing the Slomp-a-dee".

I stopped laughing long enough to ask what on Earth the "Slomp-a-dee" is. 

Sophie- "It is when you are sitting on your fanny of course!"

So there you have it folks, Sophie has cleared everything up for us: the slomp-a-dee is when you are sitting on your hairy vagina and the fanny brush is used for all your vaginal brushing needs. Hahahahahah, oh how entertaining life is through the eyes of a child! 

PS - In 1849 there was an unfortunate soul born in New York called Fanny Brush.  

What do you do all day?

Hooray, hooray he's back at work today! Hubby's three weeks holiday have finally come to an end and this morning he trotted off to work with the usual unhappy face that accompanies such a task. Don't get me wrong, I am not pleased that he is feeling miserable about going to work, I am thrilled however, to have my own space back and be able to get back into my own routine. It was interesting watching the transition he made over the three week period with regards to his understanding of what the day of a full time parent entails...

To begin with, Mat was all smiles and full of happiness at how delightful his children seemed to be. As far as he was concerned, the sun shone out their backsides, particularly Elliott's, and they could do no wrong. I would often vent to him about the frustrating things his darling children had done throughout the day and he would answer with "No, you must be making that up. Look at them". Of course, the minute Mat was home, the kids would put on the charm and be utterly delightful so he really didn't get to see the mischief they were getting into. 

About two weeks later however, his tune changed. He was the one venting to me and throwing his hands up in exasperation about the kids rat-bag behaviour. He was shouting at them for throwing water out of the bath, he was the one snapping at their endless whinging and demands and he was the one exhausted at the idea of having to play yet another game of trains or babies. The best part was, he spent a relatively small amount of time with them each day so in my eyes, he had little to complain about. It did however allow him the opportunity to have some insight into why our household runs the way it does. Let's take a look at this transition in pictures:    

How Mat thought I should greet him every day when he got home from work...

How the greeting actually looks...

How Mat thought dinner was made...

How dinner actually comes together...

What Mat thought I did all day...

What I actually do all day...

What he thinks it is like doing art with the kids...

What it is actually like doing art with the kids... 

What he thinks a lovely day grocery shopping is like...

What grocery shopping with kids actually looks like...

How he thinks a playroom looks all the time...

How playrooms actually loo 99.9% of the time... 

You get my point. His rosy view of parenthood is shattered. He used to say that he would happily stay home with the kids if I went back to work, but last night he confessed that he can't wait to be out of the house and back at work today. See you tonight, Darling, with screaming kids hanging off me, tired eyes hanging out of my head, dishes unwashed, eggs on toast for dinner and a maze of toys to work your way through as soon as you walk in the door. Parenthood rocks!        

Mr Mum

I was going to start today's post with the words "I love my husband but..." however I can't do that. Using the word "but" in a sentence erases everything you said before it so perhaps I shall say it like this: I love my husband and he is very skilled at frustrating the high heavens out of me. Yep that works, on with the story.

I love my husband and he is very skilled at frustrating the high heavens out of me. He has been on "holidays" for over three weeks now and while he has done some sporadic work in that time, mostly he has just been waking up every day and doing what he pleases. He has happily played in his shed, visited friends, helped other people out at the drop of a hat and generally fart arsed around with a smile on his face. I was OK with that. He works his backside off earning the income for our household so I thought I would let him enjoy himself and have a bit of a break. I also had this ridiculous notion that he would realise that I would also like to have a break and that somehow he would wake up one day and say "You know what Babe, I am going to be Mr Mum today and you just do whatever you please". I am such a fool sometimes.

Of course, this didn't happen at all. I don't know why I set my expectations so high because it only ever ends in frustration. Tired of waiting for him to offer to be Mr Mum and with the end of his holidays looming, I just outright requested it yesterday with a tone that indicated his refusal would result in WWIII. Honestly, you would have thought I had asked him to cut off his left testicle the way he resisted the idea. I frustratedly pointed out that I would not be sitting around with my feet up sipping champagne all day, I would actually be doing the BAS and Tax paperwork for his business. Still, his eagerness to look after his son was underwhelming to say the least (Soph was at Kindy so he only had Elliott to worry about) and he walked around with a frown and a a scolding look on his face all morning. Finally I could take it no more and after an argument that looked a little something like this...

...we resolved to work as a team to get the job done (insert Bob the Builder theme song here). Hubby's attitude did improve as the day went on and when I left the house last night to go to Circle, I was confident that he would handle all the Mr Mum responsibilities for the evening just fine. I did however remind him to please clean up the kitchen and clear up the toys and mess around the house. He nodded in agreement and I left the house so chuffed that we were on the same page. Then I came home...

Mat was playing in his shed and I must say that I was thrilled to see the dishes had been done. Unfortunately, that is where the Mr Mum-ness stopped. The house looked worse than before I left with toys strewn from one end to the other and polystyrene blocks creating an impressive obstacle course as I made my way in the front door. I went down to check on the kids and found Sophie sound asleep snoring her little head off. I then checked on Elliott and saw that he had once again stripped off his PJ's in an attempt to abandon his nappy and wet the bed. Then he wriggled a bit and I could hear a rustling sound. What on Earth? I thought to myself....then I took a closer look. Mat had stapled and sticky taped Elliott's nappy on! 

At that stage, I could only laugh and realise that while hubby had not been Mr Mum to the fullest extent, he had been the best version of Super Dad there is. Now if you will excuse me, I am off to fetch the scissors and cut Elliott's morning nappy off.    

Happy Monday

Good morning all my beautiful blog followers :) I am pleased to report that after a weekend involving waaaaay to much alcohol, very little sleep and a good handful of palming off my parental responsibilities, I am back in the game. Happiness and I have reunited and although I am sure our fling will have its ups and downs, today we are insanely in love. There are several things in this world that make me happy, far too many to mention, but they all seem to centre around being in the present moment: I love being immersed in a game with the kids where we are all laughing and smiling and it feels like nothing else in the world matters. I love getting lost in reading a good book or even better, attempting to write one! I love being outside feeling the grass under my toes, the warm sun on my skin and breathing in fresh, crisp lungfuls of morning air. Yep, being present can really make the smallest of things turn into full sensory, heart warming experiences. .

A few posts ago, I typed the words "Never borrow from the future. If you worry about what may happen tomorrow and it doesn't happen, you have worried in vain. Even if it does happen, you have to worry twice". I got this saying out of our Church magazine and below it is a list of things we can all do to be present and get the most out of each and every day. 

• Go to bed on time.
• Get up on time so you can start the day un-rushed.
• Say No to projects that won't fit into your time schedule, or that will compromise your mental health.
• Delegate tasks to capable others.
• Simplify and un-clutter your life.
• Less is more. (Although one is often not enough, two are often too many).
• Allow extra time to do things and get to places. 
• Pace yourself. Spread out big changes and difficult projects over time; don't lump the hard things all together. 
• Take one day at a time. 
• Separate worries from concerns. If a situation is a concern, let go of the anxiety. If you can't do anything about a situation, forget it. 
• Live within your budget; don't use credit cards for ordinary purchases.
• Have backups; have an extra car key in your wallet, an extra house key buried in the garden, extra stamps etc.
• K.M.S (Keep Mouth Shut). This single piece of advice can prevent an enormous amount of trouble.
• Do something for "the kid in you" every day.
• Carry a book with you to read while waiting in line. 
• Get enough rest. 
• Eat right.
• Get organised so everything has its place. 
• Listen to a tape while driving that can help improve your quality of life.
• Write down thoughts and inspirations. 
• Every day, find time to be alone. 
• Having problems? Talk to someone. Try to nip small problems in the bud. Don't wait until it is time to go to bed.
• Make friends. 
• Laugh. 
• Laugh some more!
• Take your work seriously, but not yourself at all. 
• Develop a forgiving attitude (most people are doing the best they can).
• Be kind to unkind people (they probably need it the most).
• Sit on your ego.
• Talk less; listen more.
• Slow down.
• Remind yourself that you are not the General Manager of the Universe.  
• Every night before bed, think of one thing that you are grateful for that you've never been grateful for before. It may have a way of turning things around for you.

I hope a few things on this list struck a chord with you and have motivated your Monday!

Kate xox     

Stuff your face Friday!

I don't know about you guys, but to me, today seems like the perfect day to dabble in a little emotional eating. What better way to deal with stress than eat loads of terrible food and beat yourself up about it afterwards? Wash that guilt down with a Mars Bar and a glass of Coke I say! Well, not really, I think I will opt for baked goods and cereal instead. It's a shame really, I have had such a good week of healthy eating and exercise and I have managed to reduce my multiple chins down to just one and a half! But today, all of that shall go out the window as I eat my troubles away. Curse you emotional eating, curse you.

My troubles are likely nothing when compared with other peoples challenges, but to me, they are significant. I know there are resolutions, I know everything will work out, blah blah blah, but right now, I am in wallowing mode and I shall stay here until I have eaten enough food to make me a viable contestant for The Biggest Loser 2013. The only hitch in the plan is that money is tight so I can't spend too much on junk food and also I don't like the kids seeing me eat junk food because I am always harping on at them about making healthy food choices. I shall just have to hide in the bathroom, away from the kids, behind a locked door and eat a giant bowl of Rice Bubbles covered in cream (don't knock it 'till you've tried it) washed down with a glass of chilled champagne. Oh, wait, it's like not even 8am yet...the cream could be a little indulgent as a breakfast choice. Rice Bubbles and champagne it is! (Don't worry Child Protective Services, of course I am not going to have that for breakfast...we ran out of Rice Bubbles two days ago when the kids poured them all over the floor while I was neglecting to adequately supervise them). Champagne it is!

Needless to say, yesterdays efforts to improve my mood made no real difference at all but I am hopeful that things can only get better. Bottoms up ladies! Happy Friday xox 

Moody Mama

If you were to see me today, you would notice something a little different. My hair is still blonde, my arse is still quite sizeable and my eyes are still hovering above big black bags of exhaustion. The only difference is my forehead; it is home today to a big flashing sign that says "Piss Off". I have no idea why but I have woken up in the crankiest mood on record. Let's see if I can work this out...

First up, it has been raining and wet for several days now so that's a sure fire way to make any Mother moody. The kids and I have been spending all of our time together, indoors, much to their disappointment and my frustration...agggghhhhh! Thank goodness we have Mother's Group today so the kids can run amok with their friends and us Mum's can sit around, sip tea and vent about how bloody annoying this job is at times.

Then there is the awesome dream I was having last night. Dr Travis Stork from the TV show The Doctors had whisked me away to a cabin in the snow for a weekend to remember. He is so dreamy!! The only problem was that the bloody kids were there too! Their neediness and endless requirements for care and attention are now spilling over into my dreams! I know it was only a dream but I think I may be feeling a little annoyed at the cheeky buggers for cramping my style.

Oh and Mat, my dear husband who was completely absent in my frisky dream last night (don't tell him that though...I told him about my dream this morning except that I didn't mention Dr Travis Stork was the hero of the story...I actually lied and told Mat that it was all about him. The things us wives have to do!) Anyway, Mat has been home WAY too much lately. He is kind of on three weeks holiday and working sporadically and the issue with him being home is twofold. First of all, with him being home, I expect that he will help out with the kids and the running of the household more...this isn't happening to the degree that I would like it to. The second part of the problem is that he keeps wanting to cuddle and be near me! Sure this doesn't sound like a "problem" as such and it was nice for the first day or two but now it is just hindering the flow of my day. I have discovered that I have a "touch threshold" and between the kids climbing all over me, Mat tapping my bum every time he walks by me and wanting to cuddle me all day, I am over being touched. I think I just need a break from being touched (gosh, I sound like a nutter!)   

Finally, there are the usual stressors of finances, endless housework, more to do in a day than the hours allow, Elliott rapidly approaching the Terrible Two's, Sophie giving me attitude like a teenager, battling to lose weight and find time to exercise each day...the list just goes on and on. 

I guess, upon reflection, I have two options. I can go back to sleep and meet up with Dr Travis Stork, or I can work out a way to destress, relax and focus on just one day at a time. After all, there is no need to borrow anxiety from the future: 

"Never borrow from the future. If you worry about what may happen tomorrow and it doesn't happen, you have worried in vain. Even if it does happen, you have to worry twice". (Author unknown)   

Yep, I think I will get us ready for Mum's group, go and have a chilled out morning then when I get home I shall exercise and try and fit in a meditation. Here's hoping all of that shall lift my mood! 

Dreamy Dr Travis Stork, presumably just finishing up a shift in the office before our weekend at the snow cabin. 

  

Me time. Ha!

What a joke that is. "Me time" is so elusive when you have little children and carving it out in your day is such a challenge. I have decided that I am going to move myself up on the priority list and make sure that I get to exercise every day. So far so good and I have been for a run three times this week already...actually it goes more like this: run, get puffed, nearly faint then walk; run, get puffed, realise I look like a total weirdo then walk; run up the street towards home so all the neighbours think I have been jogging the whole time and that is why I am back so quick (it has nothing to do with the fact that the distance I travelled was short). But with all of that aside, I am pleased with myself that I have managed to make it happen every day. It's not easy running with Elliott in the pram and the dog by my side...it is kind of like taping your arms to your hips and trying to run like that (hence the realisation that I look like a weirdo with my shoulders lunging back and forth to compensate for my arms being occupied with the pram and the leash!) 

It was raining this morning so I decided to do an exercise DVD instead of brave the cold, wet outdoors. I had three spectators, Sophie, Elliott and Toby the dog, and I let them get up to whatever they wanted to in order for me to do the full workout. What a fool I am. My workload for this morning has now increased because Toby decided to chew up toilet rolls and spread them all over the floor and there is also a lovely crunching sound as you walk around courtesy of the rice bubbles strewn everywhere. There are so many rice bubbles all over the living room floor that even the dog is sick of eating them to clean them up. I guess I will just have to get the broom out and take care of it! Then again, I am having a baking day with the kids today so the floor is undoubtedly going to get even filthier so perhaps I shall wait until they are in bed this evening to worry about cleaning the floors. God, I hope no one drops in for a visit today!!!!!!

As well as cardio, I have been doing a bit of Yoga, Pilates and stretching on the lounge room floor each day. Have you ever tried to do a downward facing dog pose with two children using you as a tunnel? Or doing an upward facing dog pose with two children riding you like a horse? Or just doing any floor exercises with the dog constantly sniffing your face? At least I can put the dog outside but I seriously question the effectiveness of these exercises when the kids are climbing all over me...for some reason, I feel I am not getting the full benefits. Hmmm. 

I am determined though and I shall persevere. I give the kids my attention and care all day long so a little time in the morning for me to exercise isn't too much to ask. In fact, when you think about it, a fitter healthier me is only a handful of exercise and a pinch of ignoring the kids away!

Goodnight sweet heart

Like most parents, I count down to bed time like nothing else. If the kids are up past 7pm my parenting slips, significantly. It would appear however, that my job does not stop once they are in bed. Sophie has always had the trick of stripping off her PJ's once tucked in safely for the night and now Elliott is cottoning onto the trick too. So as I head off to bed, I check on the kids one last time and I am always amused by what I find...

What you see here is the most gorgeous little toosh ever! A snapshot I took a few nights ago of Elliott wearing his nappy as a hat. I think I shall start stapling the nappy on because there is nothing worse than changing wet sheets in the middle of the night!  

As for Sophie, she is utterly obsessed with being pregnant. Day or night she is stuffing dolls and teddies up her shirt in an effort to look the part. Over the past few months she has been quite creative with her pregnancy pursuits once tucked into bed for the night. She has had a teddy nearly larger than her stuffed up her shirt and into her boxer shorts (needless to say, they are now stretched beyond repair) whilst laying sound asleep on a blanket on the floor...presumably her hospital bed. She has worn jumpers as pants so she can stuff as many dolls as possible in there and she has even snuck into my room and swiped things like belts and togs to wear and stuff babies in. Every time I find her she is asleep and I have no idea how she finds it remotely comfortable! Last night when I went to check on her, she had tried something new...  

This is the giant teddy, nearly bigger than her, and she appears to have been riding it like a horse and then fallen asleep. She did manage to strip off her PJ's too of course!  Oh goodness, what will you come up with next Sophie??!!

Why do people shout at each other?

Good morning everyone! Happy Monday :) I finally made it to Church last night for the first time in nearly two months and I am pleased that I went. I always feel good after going and listening to the "platform worker" (just a title to sum up the person, other than our Reverend, who gives the reading and address and also does the clairvoyance). We have a meditation during each service and last night I did a spiritual healing on a lady called Mrs M whilst the meditation was going on. It is only the second or third healing I have done since being trained by our Reverend so I didn't really know what to expect. I said my little prayers of protection, called on Spirit to provide the healing and placed my hands on Mrs M's shoulders. About a minute in I kept getting the word "Grandmother" but I tried to ignore it and focus on the healing. This Grandmother, however, would not be ignored and after I moved my hands from Mrs M's head back to her shoulders, I could feel the pressure of something on my hands and I got the message that this Grandmother wanted to let Mrs M know that she is there for her and nearby at the moment. Afterwards, I asked Mrs M how she found it and it was very interesting when she said that the second time I put my hands on her shoulders she felt a really strong rush of energy flowing down her body! We chatted further and I gave Mrs M the message from her Grandmother. Mrs M was chuffed and said that just a few days ago she had a really strong feeling that her Grandmother was with her and that when her Grandmother was alive, they were very very close. How cool is that??? Very cool I say and I love when I can get messages from Spirit that make other people feel good. That is the whole point of it after all :) 

Anyway, I am getting off track. As I said, I love listening to the platform worker and last night, this was the address given by the worker for the night: "Why do people shout at each other?" I thought it was a really clear and succinct way of looking at relationships, be they with your partner, children, family or friends. Enjoy! 

A Hindu saint, who was visiting river Ganges to take a bath, found a group of family members on the banks shouting in anger at each other. He turned to his disciples smiled and asked,

'Why do people shout in anger at each other?'

Disciples thought for a while, one of them said, 'Because we lose our calm, we shout.'

'But, why should you shout when the other person is just next to you? You can as well tell him what you have to say in a soft manner,' asked the saint.

Disciples gave some other answers but none satisfied the other disciples. Finally the saint explained:

'When two people are angry at each other, their hearts distance a lot. To cover that distance they must shout to be able to hear each other. The angrier they are, the stronger they will have to shout to hear each other to cover that great distance.

'What happens when two people fall in love? They don't shout at each other, but talk softly, because their hearts are very close. The distance between them is either nonexistent or very small.'

The saint continued. 'When they love each other even more, what happens? They do not speak, only whisper and they get even closer to each other in their love. Finally they even need not whisper, they only look at each other and that's all. That is how close two people are when they love each other.'

He looked at his disciples and said,

'So when you argue do not let your hearts get distant, Do not say words that distance each other more, Or else there will come a day when the distance is so great that you will not find the path to return.'

Why did God make Mothers?

Happy Friday guys!! In a few hours I will be collecting my gorgeous children from their Grandparents' house after a heavenly two day break. The little cherry on top is that I will be having a massage this morning to finish off my much needed alone time...what a treat! So to spread the happiness, today I will share with you a Friday Funny: Why God Made Mums (sorry I can't credit this to its original source because I found it on a piece of paper in my office, presumably buried years before). These are the answers give by Grade 2 students to the following questions...

Why did God make Mothers?

• She's the only one who knows where the sticky tape is.
• Mostly to clean the house.
• To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make Mothers?

• He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
• Magic, plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
• God made my Mum just the same like he made me, he just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are Mothers made of?

• God makes Mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world; and one dab of mean. 
• They had to get their start from men's bones, then they mostly use string, I think. 

Why did God give you your mother and not some other Mum?

• We're related.
• God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's Mums like me. 

What kind of little girls was your Mum?

• My Mum has always been my Mum and none of that other stuff. 
• I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. 
• They say she used to be nice. 

What did Mum need to know about Dad before she married him?

• His last name. 
• She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
• Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say no to drugs and yes to chores?

Why did your Mum marry your Dad?

• My Dad makes the best spaghetti in the world, and my Mum eats a lot.
• She got too old to do anything else with him. 
• My Grandma says that Mum didn't have her thinking cap on. 

Who's the boss at your house?

• Mum doesn't want to be the boss, but she has to because Dad is such an idiot. 
• Mum. You can tell by the room inspections. She sees stuff under the bed. 
• I guess Mum is but only because she has a lot more to do than Dad.

What's the difference between Mums and Dads?

• Mums work at work and work at home and Dads just go to work at work. 
• Mum's know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
• Dad's are taller and stronger but Mum's have all the real power because that's who you've got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friends.
• Mums have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. 

What does your Mum do in her spare time?

• Mother's don't have spare time. 
• To hear her talk, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your Mum perfect?

• On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery. 
• You know, her hair. I'd dye it, maybe blue. 

If you could change one thing about your Mum, what would it be?

• I would like her to get rid of those invisible eyes in the back of her head. 
• She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 
• I'd make my Mum smarter, then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.