Why did God make Mothers?

Happy Friday guys!! In a few hours I will be collecting my gorgeous children from their Grandparents' house after a heavenly two day break. The little cherry on top is that I will be having a massage this morning to finish off my much needed alone time...what a treat! So to spread the happiness, today I will share with you a Friday Funny: Why God Made Mums (sorry I can't credit this to its original source because I found it on a piece of paper in my office, presumably buried years before). These are the answers give by Grade 2 students to the following questions...

Why did God make Mothers?

• She's the only one who knows where the sticky tape is.
• Mostly to clean the house.
• To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make Mothers?

• He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
• Magic, plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
• God made my Mum just the same like he made me, he just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are Mothers made of?

• God makes Mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world; and one dab of mean. 
• They had to get their start from men's bones, then they mostly use string, I think. 

Why did God give you your mother and not some other Mum?

• We're related.
• God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's Mums like me. 

What kind of little girls was your Mum?

• My Mum has always been my Mum and none of that other stuff. 
• I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. 
• They say she used to be nice. 

What did Mum need to know about Dad before she married him?

• His last name. 
• She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
• Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say no to drugs and yes to chores?

Why did your Mum marry your Dad?

• My Dad makes the best spaghetti in the world, and my Mum eats a lot.
• She got too old to do anything else with him. 
• My Grandma says that Mum didn't have her thinking cap on. 

Who's the boss at your house?

• Mum doesn't want to be the boss, but she has to because Dad is such an idiot. 
• Mum. You can tell by the room inspections. She sees stuff under the bed. 
• I guess Mum is but only because she has a lot more to do than Dad.

What's the difference between Mums and Dads?

• Mums work at work and work at home and Dads just go to work at work. 
• Mum's know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
• Dad's are taller and stronger but Mum's have all the real power because that's who you've got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friends.
• Mums have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. 

What does your Mum do in her spare time?

• Mother's don't have spare time. 
• To hear her talk, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your Mum perfect?

• On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery. 
• You know, her hair. I'd dye it, maybe blue. 

If you could change one thing about your Mum, what would it be?

• I would like her to get rid of those invisible eyes in the back of her head. 
• She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 
• I'd make my Mum smarter, then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.